House TalkN is a fun lookiloo at houses, houses, houses. It will answer pressing questions like, "When folks build a McMansion on a small lot, what are they compensating for?" or "Was the real estate agent drunk when they staged this house?" or "Why don't the Smiths' ever leave their drapes open when I am on a harmless walk-by?"

Tuesday, December 18, 2012

Offering What We Can...

I am so grateful for the community of bloggers that I have found. I first heard the horrific news of the Connecticut tragedy from these women. I cried my first tears while sitting in a parking lot, reading their words. 
When I could find no words, I read this: How To Live In This World
When I needed to find beauty, I read this: Desperately Seeking Signs Of Beauty
When I could not express my own anger, I read this: Shattered
These are the women that have been my touchstone for four days.
Many of these women write In The Powder Room and we struggled with how to go on. 
Yesterday, Lerner led the way for us with "We Carry Each Other Out Of The Hurt."
"So in this space, we are choosing to just go forward. We hope that you agree with that choice. We hope that our attempts at humor and love will bring lightness in the dark. We hope that we can shoulder some of the burden and take some of the weight off of the life-crushing density of this situation.

But most importantly we didn't want you to misinterpret these efforts as brevity. We have felt this sorrow, we still do. We will for quite some time.
If there is anything we have to offer in this global hurting, we believe it is our ability to put forth a community of laughter, hope, thoughts... sometimes nonsense.
It's not that we are trying to sweep it under the rug or disregard it. It's not even that we are trying to distract you from it. We are saying, yes, look at it, feel it, isn't it awful... now let's hold hands and walk forward.
Because if we don't, if we stay in this place of hurt, then the horror of that event has won out. And our strength as a community is that we don't let that happen. We carry each other out of the hurt."
Today, my post about inappropriate clothing for little girls is running. I wrote it last week. I wrote it before Connecticut. Everything feels like "before Connecticut." It feels trite. It feels unimportant. 
This is our small offering of what we can do. We can offer a break. We can offer a distraction.


  1. I need something to make me laugh because so much else is making me cry right now. Can't listen to NPR in the morning, as is my usual ritual, so I tried putting on the Christmas station. What comes on but John Lennon's "Happy Christmas (War is Over)." NOT HELPING, HIPPIES.

    So let's laugh at stupid stuff together.

  2. I agree, we need to walk together and move forward, not let the "awfuls" win out. I'm trying to move onward, but keep the loss in my heart. I have 4 grandchildren, one the same age as those lost, so I hold them close to my heart and thank God they're here. Please help us out of the dark and make us laugh again - we could use it I think!

    1. Thank you, Marianne. Laughter is the medicine for my soul. My funny feels broken but I will share it as soon as I find it.

  3. I too hae been touched and strengthened by the community of bloggers, and agree to move on and offer distraction is all we can really do.

    1. I will write letters, sign petitions and stand witness to what has happened. But, I have to find a way back to funny. It's what I do. It's how I cope. It's what I can offer.

  4. While it may seem trite, life must go on. We can find a way to be respectful and still live our lives. It's helping . . .

    1. Living full and contributing lives is what we can offer, right?
      Thank you, Kathy.

  5. Beautifully done, Kerry. I know exactly what you mean about everything feeling so trite now. Things we all ranted about and laughed about before last Friday seem so trivial today. I love what Lerner wrote and what you shared though about moving forward, holding hands. There is no other way out of this hell. I love you Kerry.

    1. Amen, Bearded One. Thank you for being our fearless leader ITPR.


I live for comments, so please pop in and say "hello!"
You can also follow HouseTalkN on Twitter, Pinterest and/or Facebook!