House TalkN is a fun lookiloo at houses, houses, houses. It will answer pressing questions like, "When folks build a McMansion on a small lot, what are they compensating for?" or "Was the real estate agent drunk when they staged this house?" or "Why don't the Smiths' ever leave their drapes open when I am on a harmless walk-by?"

Tuesday, January 14, 2014

Let's Blame Winter, Shall We?

I like to think that no problem is too big to blame on others. My husband can tell you that I can turn the blame around faster than a cheating politician. 
Taking my cues from skanky politicians, I use a few of their tricks.
1. Make sad, pitiful faces and look all victim-y. "I am just torn up about this."
2. Be strong in your denials, no matter how large the evidence. "I.did.not.wreck.that.car!"
3. Turn the tables. "If you hadn't -----, we wouldn't be in this position."
4. Wave a shiny object to distract from the issue. "I think I'm pregnant."
5. Blaming your childhood is always a good time. "My mother never let me -----."
Sadly, I have overused these approaches and they don't pack the punch they used to. I had to dig deep for some new tactics.
I have been a total sloth this winter. I have let my responsibilities slide. Instead of owning up to my behavior, I played the "winter card." 
"Winter is killing me."
"It was too cold to go to the store. You don't want me to get frostbite, do you? DO YOU?!?"
"I didn't get to the laundry because it is so gray outside. It's a thing. For real."
"I haven't shaved because I am winterizing all the things."
I'm playing the blame game In The Powder Room. Come join the fun. Because, blaming others is always fun.


4 comments:

  1. Well, I didn't do laundry 'cause it was so cold, the pipes might burst and that would be awful. So instead of complaining about the lack of clean pants, focus on the money I saved you in repairs. -- Actual convo I had with my husband last week.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Amen, Lady. Winter has got it's grip on me!

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    Replies
    1. Please let me know when spring arrives. I'll just be here...eating all the things.

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